.random.facts.

I've been away for the weekend so I missed the first two items on my list. So this will be a fairly long entry.

1. List 20 random facts about yourself.

. I’m deathly afraid of mice.
. I haven't seen my family in 10 years. Going home for the first time in December, speaking of, and home is South Africa.
. I wanted to be a marine biologist when I was younger. Found out how much time I would have to be in school, and also realized I sort of suck at science.
. I’m head over heels in love with my dog. She is the best thing that's ever happened to me.
. I’m not at all comfortable in my body.
. I’m a cancer, and a true one at that. I can't hide my emotions even when I try really hard.
. I’m a sucker for chick flicks.
. I hate grammar.
. I always put my friends and family before me, and I’m finally at a point in my life where I need to do me.
. I love the smell of laundry as well as the smell of a campfire.
. I’m horrible at snowboarding, but it's one of my most favorite things to do.
. The longest I’ve ever lived in one city is 7 years. Actually more like 6.5 years.
. I’m extremely shy and introverted.
. I love to read but I am not a reader. It takes me a while to get into a book, and then a while longer to finish it. It takes a certain kind of book to keep me going without wanting to put it down. From the last few posts, I’m sure you can figure out what that book was.
. I have three siblings whom are all younger than me. I love them all something fierce.
. I love music; there is always some sort of music playing in my head at all times. Currently it is peaches' fuck the pain away.
. I love being outdoors. Camping, snowboarding, and hiking (even though I’m pretty horrid at it), swimming, biking…
. I have friends all over the world. In fact I have a friend in every continent with the exception of Antarctica.
. I plan on setting foot on every continent. Three down, four to go.
. I hate fruit flavored things...like tootsie rolls for example.

2. Describe 3 legitimate fears you have and explain how they became fears.

a. Mice. I’m so deathly afraid of mice it's crazy. I want to say rodents in general actually. I don’t know why I am deathly afraid of them, but I am. I remember being in Uganda, waking up in the middle of the night and needing to go downstairs to get a glass of water. I walked into the kitchen, flipped on the light, and screamed bloody murder for about ten minutes. There was the biggest fucking rat on the kitchen island. Ever since then...well yeah.

b. I’m afraid of failing. I was always put under pressure by my dad growing up to do the best I could in school. If I got a C it wasn’t good enough. A B still wasn’t good enough, why didn't I get a B+, it wasn’t good enough, I had to work harder, and do better.

c. I’m afraid I’m never going to find that person that wants to be with me, and I with them forever. I’m pretty sure, and I’ve just about convinced myself that I will be alone with Zuri forever. I’m starting to be ok with that.

3. Describe your relationship with your parents.

I used to be daddy's little girl. I used to want to grow up to just just like him. Everything I did I did because I wanted his approval. But then, well. Shit happened, and now we talk twice a year. Once on my birthday, and the next around Christmas/new year’s. I’ve tried to maintain a relationship with him, but after the last time he called (my last birthday); I’ve decided that I’m done pretending we have a relationship. I’m done.

My mom has become one of my best friends. I love her dearly. She is my idol. We didn’t get along when I was younger, but then again, it could have just been the teenager me who chose not to get along with her. When I left to go to boarding school, our relationship strengthened a whole lot. She is the strongest woman I know, she has been through so much shit in her life, and she is still standing with her head held up high. I’m insanely proud of her, and if I can be half the woman she is when I grow up, I think I’d be able to say I turned out ok.