Hmm...

"I want to love you. But if it's not right, what can I do?'"

I've been having nightmares. Every night for the past week, and I wish I wouldn't.This morning I woke up crying. I wish this shit would stop.

I saw a picture of my dad. From the funeral. I wish I would have been there. At the funeral.  She was my favorite. To see him again, as a fly against the wall. None of them have said what he said. I am curious, but I won't ask. Because I don't want to be the one torelay the information.

I've never dreaded a day so much. As I do this one coming up. It's going to suck. So so much. I wish I could skip over it. Every time it comes up, in my head or in conversation, that dreadful feeling comes about. Still trying to figure out if I could avoid the whole...week. Way to fuck me up while I'm on my way up.

Home. I want to go home. I am, but not soon enough. I yearn my mothers hug.

Sometimes I wish we were more than just roommates.
=/

Framily dinner at my place...I don't know what I want to make...lasagna maybe. Or plantains. Hmmm plantains.Makes me think of home.

Nostalgia.

I love an exhausted dog.

I really want that camera. I can get it if I save properly.
But I'm also saving for that wrangler.

Fuck money.